Martin Haglund Eriksson - 11 Sec July

-Martin Haglund Eriksson
-11 Sec July


This is great, I love that that you kept it subtle for the first part. It's even more impressive as you've only been doing his for 6 months! In general the acting choices are good, he feels believable and has quite a lot of life to him. Here are a few thoughts that I think would help make it even better.

- He feels a bit lifeless for the first two seconds. It would be nice if we saw his reaction to whatever his friend has just said to him, something that shows his utter disbelief. Maybe he could be looking at him at the start and we see a small reaction, something as small as a blink and a small grimace or frown, before he looks down to the table in dismay. He could even open his mouth as if to speak when he glances up at him, but he can't get the words out as he is so shocked at his stupidity!

Or if you intend to keep him looking at the table as he is, try and amp it up a bit with some heavier breathing in his chest and more anger in his eyes. Some tiny eye darts will help to show his inner thoughts.

- For the line "and totally redeem yourself!", I feel as though his facial acting should be excited rather than angry?! To me this line says that he thinks his friend has made up for all his past stupidity, so I think it would be cool if he has a big dumb grin on his face and excitement in his eyes! It would also be a nice contrast to the anger in the first part.

- I like that you put some eye darts in on "like this", but I think they're a bit too quick, try and hold on each extreme for at least 4 frames. And make sure you vary the timing, for example don't just hold for 6 frames each time.

- When he stands up at the end it would be nice to get a bit of overlap on his head.

- His head also stays a bit too level when he moves forward towards camera, rotate it forward a bit as he starts to come towards us for a bit of anticipation.

- Try and offset the fist slam from the head nod a bit more.

- The screen left shoulder sometimes feels a bit too disconnected from the chest.

Great work on the whole, we look forward to more!

- Anim Dailies

1 comment:

  1. Thank you so much for the review!

    I've actually already rendered the sequence, 'cause I didn't think you'd be quick enough to review this before the competition was over, but now I just wanna get back in there and change the things you suggested!

    Really great feedback and great suggestions!

    About the way this character's mood when he says "redeem yourself" it's me not understanding the line. I looked "redeem" up and it seemed to me that, as you say, he is happy about what his friend has done, that he's redeemed himself. But I still thought he was being ironic or something, seeing how he sounds so dang mad.

    So thanks for your help interperating the line for me :) I'll see if it's fixeable to make him look happier instead! As you say, it'd make for a welcome contrast to his anger!

    Thanks! This was great! I'll hopefully send you a new one for next months competition :)